The well-mannered modern mother should try and remember that all matters dealing with bodily fluid and bodily function fall under the category of biology. This list includes but is not limited to: fertility, sex, pregnancy, birth, nursing, diapering, and toilet training. These topics may be discussed with one’s doctor or a very close friend in the confines of one’s home. Contrary to current custom and daytime television these topics are not proper for group discussion or loud discussion in public. Additionally, no matter how evolved they may seem, well-mannered fathers and especially fathers-in-law truly have zero interest in any of these topics. Except sex.

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