Friday Frivolity - Drama in the First Person

I was just thinking, I could use a little less drama these days, and then friend Karsten showed me this.   Brilliant.

P.S.
No offense Don but I'm just not that into you anymore.  I know there are loads of women out there who don't mind you taking a powder for 17 months  but apparently I'm not one of them.   So, now that you're back, guess what?  I don't care.  No giddy anticipation, no butterflies, no Zou Bisou Bisou here.  Seeing you again has mostly just reminded me why we stopped seeing each other in the first place.   You have the same old issues and seem to have picked up a couple of new ones since we last met.  So thanks for the good times, please tell Joanie "Well done, it's about time" and I hope to see you some evening once we're all caught up on Modern Family.

Otherwise Occupied

Someday, the modern mother who is not currently employed will find herself filling out forms, and specifically, find herself required to write something for “occupation.” Sigh. What to say? While she is continually occupied (lunches, laundry, got to find those health forms, get a math tutor?) it seems she lacks an occupation. Many are tempted to write “Family COO” or Family “CEO” depending on if they actually know the difference between a COO and a CEO. Others might prefer to stick to the more straight-forward “at home”, the slightly cloying "homemaker", or of course just “mother.”

But it’s hard not to feel like writing “mother” is not enough these days. Not only does the term not describe entirely who she is and how she spends her time, but most mothers these days also have a paid occupation to list. As so, what should the stay at home mother say? Does she write, “former defense attorney” or “former software developer”?  Or does she list her most ardently pursued non-parenting, but non-income generating activities: “blogger,” “marathon runner,” or “PTO president”?

Thanks in part to the Real Housewives franchise, women who do not work are seen more than ever as entitled, dumb, and shallow. The reality, of course is that mothers enter and exit the workforce regularly. Those not employed for a salary are often employed keeping schools, community and religious institutions afloat: running the school fundraisers, teaching Sunday School, coaching, organizing food drives, or even just helping to give rides to the children of mothers who are on a plane to London for a business meeting. 

These days, I have settled on “currently at home” since I have been out of the work force for the latest 3 out of my 12 years as a mother. But perhaps I should embrace the career distortions highlighted in the Poorly Drawn Lines comic below. After all, doesn’t a few blog posts a month make me as much of a blogger as the person reposting cat pictures on tumblr?

Me, Myself, and I

Here at Manners for Modern Mothers, we’re going to make a change. We’re going to embrace the first person singular. Yes, we plan to sometimes use the pronoun, I.

When we began this blog, we were both reluctant to be too personal, to over-share. Perhaps this disinclination resulted from being brought up with an emphasis on discretion, modesty, and always wearing a slip. Perhaps, we were slow to come around to first person posting because neither of us came of age in the Facebook world. Yet, as our blog has grown, we’ve come to feel like we know you all, dear readers, and we've become more comfortable with the personal pronoun.

Don’t worry, we’re not planning any posts about surgical procedures, nail clipping details, or our latest encounters with noro virus. Instead, we hope to continue to bring you social commentary, humor and an occasional rant, only now it may include the pronoun “I.” So there you have it, the beginning of a new era; an era that I, for one, hope to embrace.

Thanks for asking.

Thank you to Allison at Daily Outfit for asking about my favorite rainy day outfit.  I had no idea I had so much to say on the subject.  First a closet revolution, now this.  Please enjoy this piece and be sure to visit her Pintrest board here.

photo from asos

Last week - Oh My.

What a week it was for the modern mother.  It began with the loss of a child's two adult teeth in a freak Saturday-night-ice cream-dance-kitchen-accident.   Dental surgery is really no way to spend a Monday.  For modern child or mother.  Thank heaven all is well.

If only... 

Maybe this sort of experience is why The Juggle wrote Why Parents Make Awesome Managers. 

Did you see the article in Vogue about a 7-year-old's weight?  It even made the NY Times Sunday Style section this weekend.  Controversy or brilliant publishing coup?  You decide.

 Is Wednesday really three times as long as every other day of the week?  Or is it just in our town where all grade school students are dismissed at noon?  That's right.  Every Wednesday.  Noon dismissal.   

A mannerly friend assures us that the reason for such a wacky week was that the Moon, Jupiter and Venus were meeting in a celestial rendezvous.

Thursday was certainly a bit out there having decided to explore a Reiki/Reflexology foot massage and total life healing (apparently) treatment as found via social shopping/daily deal.  Now we're not saying it wasn't interesting and relaxing.  The modern mother has no idea how she has survived all these years without knowing about her chakras. 

 Friday, ah Friday.  The relaxing end of the week.  Except for the "concussion watch" going on  because the modern son decided to impale himself at a friend's house Thursday evening.  Again - thank goodness, all is well.

If it were not for the arrival of a package from Amazon containing the most fantastic product ever, at least if your glasses and silverware were looking like ours, the week might have been a complete bust.   To make a secret of it no longer, this miracle product  is called  Lemi Shine.  And this modern family could not be more astounded and pleased.  Sometimes, it's the little things.

Here's to a better week for all.  Happy Monday!

Image from momaroo

Friday Frivolity - What to do until the next season of Downton

While the modern mother will always have Seasons 1 & 2 to re-watch and re-re-re-watch, she and her delightful offspring can find hours of fun playing with Vulture's Downton Abby Paper Dolls.  Poor Mr. Pamuk. 

picture from Vulture.com

The paper dolls come from Vulture and their episode recaps are also most informative.  The modern mother may enjoy seeing who's who in real life.    For a Season 3 preview here are some gratuitous shots of Downton in the  Roaring Twenties.  Don't miss the video at the end of the article.

oh happy days!

If that isn't enough and the mannerly mother finds herself craving Masterpiece drama of a similar ilk, no BBC video library should be without the following:

Brideshead Revisited 30th Anniversary Edition (my that does date one, now doesn't it) and do read the book and everything else by Evelyn Waugh

picture from mail online

The House of Eliott - the story of two English sisters who set up a couture house in London following WW1 to rival Chanel across the channel.  A personal favorite.

 picture google images

Pride & Prejudice - Colin Firth version, of course.  You might try that book as well.  The author, Miss Austin, is well thought of by many readers.

 picture from E!

 If you need a little suspense and murder to go with your English drama, you can't do better than Sherlock.  The second season begins May 6 on Masterpiece.  We adore this modern adaptation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's classics.  Could it be because of one Benedict Cumberbatch?

 picture from BBCTV

 Lest we forget the modern mother may be able to fill her Downtonless time with Mad Men Season 5  starting (at last!) this Sunday.

Happy Weekend.

 

A Wake up to Make up

To the modern mother accustomed to greeting the world bare-faced, the following tidbit of information could be life altering: women who wear make up are considered more competent by others. Yep, you heard that right: more make up, more competent. Not prettier, sexier, or more alluring, but competent. You can read the whole story here, or here, or watch it here. And we can move on to consider what this means for the modern mother.

Suddenly, the modern mother’s world is upended. Parent teacher conference? Better brush on a little mascara. Private school interview? Break out the blush. Stopping by your husband’s office? Does that call for lipstick or not? Pulling herself together suddenly means more than taking a shower and brushing the lint off her clothes. Make up might not be something only applied hastliy and clumsily before weddings and parties, anymore. 

The problem for this modern mother is that she spent so much of her adolescence wearing tie-dyes and Birkenstocks that she missed much of the experimenting-with-make-up stage, and ended up as an unknowing participant in "make up free Mondays"not to mention Tuesdays, Wednesdays, etc.

It’s probably safe to say that clownish, inexpertly applied make up will not increase the appearance of competence. Thankfully, there are experts out there, like our fellow blogger Larissa at Sparkle, Inc. or Emily McHugh at Daily Outfit. Doubtless there are many others too, but no time to seek them out, time to go hit Sephora! 

*image from vancitybride.com